What to do when your child won’t listen to your advice
A subject that comes up often in my Facebook group, Supportive Parents, Successful Students, is that of what to do when your child just isn't listening to your advice on their studies. It can be so frustrating as a parent to see your child making mistakes you know they could have avoided, if only they'd have listened to your advice.
What to do when your child won't listen to your advice
Both you and your child want the very best for them when it comes to their academic studies and exam results, so it's in both your interests to find a way to work together. Here are four of my top tips to make that happen.
1. Acknowledge your good intentions
As a parent, any advice you give your child is coming from a place of love. However, it's easy for that emotion and motivation to get lost in amongst the nagging! Take a step back, and remind yourself of the motivation; are you communicating the love that you feel for your child? Children can be annoying – wanting to be ‘grown up' and independent, grumpy, messy – but make sure they understand why you are helping them and that it's because you love them.
2. Have compassion for your child's age and stage
At this age, it's natural for kids to be pulling away from you and trying to be independent. However, this inevitably creates tension. Try to be compassionate that it's natural and right for your child to do this. If they're getting decisions wrong, find a way to help them move forward without losing face. Give them space to make mistakes, learn and move on, but without giving them too much of a hard time – it's all part of growing up.
3. Find the common ground
You both want what's best for your child, but you have more life experience to go on. At their age, finding the route to success will be harder and more winding! As a parent, it can be frustrating to watch, but you'll need to work together to find some common ground, which leads me on to my next point…
4. Come up with a way of communicating that works for you
You and your child must find a way of communicating together. Why not go for a walk together, side-by-side? This will make it easier for you both to say what's on your mind and reach a decision about how you will continue to communicate going forward – without arguments and nagging. If you're struggling to find an effective way to talk to each other honestly, I can help; this is what I do with families in The Extraordinaries Club. There is lots of information in my course, The Exam Success Formula, which helps families to communicate better, with less nagging, more talking and resulting in a happier environment all round. The course is available as part of the membership to The Extraordinaries Club, along with many more resources.
The Extraordinaries Club
The Extraordinaries Club is the culmination of everything I've ever learnt throughout my time in education – both at school and university, and as a teacher and academic coach. Ideal for students in Years 10, 11 and 12, joining The Extraordinaries Club will give them the best chance of embedding good study habits early on. The Extraordinaries Club brings together all of the knowledge, resources and strategies from my course, The Exam Success Formula, plus I am available to support your family throughout the duration of your membership. You can read more about what being a member of the club will bring here.
Are you ready to find out more?
Click here to find out more about The Extraordinaries Club and sign-up. If you have any questions, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I'll be happy to help you make the right decision for your family.